Before I had children, I would have sworn up and down that MY children would NEVER be glued to a screen. My pre-parenthood vision was that my children would be too busy enjoying arts and crafts projects, performing backyard “science experiments,” playing sports, and singing Kumbaya around a campfire to care about video games, TV shows, YouTube channels, and the myriad apps and games that hold so many young brains captive.
Boy, was I wrong.
The truth is that screen time is pretty unavoidable these days—for adults and children, alike. However, studies show that children who are exposed to high levels of screen time at a young age are at a higher risk for depression and anxiety, and may struggle with concentration, anger, frustration, and even sleep hygiene. Furthermore, the Journal of the American Medical Association has published reports underscoring the connection between screen time and ADHD.
Of course, the Covid-19 pandemic didn’t help any of this. The pandemic essentially forced children to rely on screens for education, entertainment, and socialization. Now, parents and educators are scrambling to figure out the best path forward.
For children who are traveling on unexpected developmental pathways, screen time raises even bigger questions and concerns. As parents of developmentally different children, it’s especially important that we find the right balance between allowing our children to engage with technology, and ensuring that they have ample time for other activities that foster their development.
Here are some tips to help you navigate this complex issue:
1. Location, location, location:
There is a place for technology, but the kitchen table isn’t it. And no, I don’t necessarily mean the literal kitchen table. Anywhere you spend time bonding as a family is probably not the best place for tablets or other screens. In my house we have a rule: no toes, toys, or tech at the table. Encourage your child to engage in technology-free face-to-face interactions with family members and friends. This can help them develop communication skills, empathy, and emotional intelligence.
2. A tool for transitions:
Transitioning from one place or activity to another can be overstimulating, so this is something that technology can actually help with. I can remember my child having a very difficult time making the transition from home to school one day. I knew that they were hungry, and the only way I was able to calm them down enough to eat was to play a show on my phone. Don’t think of this as rewarding bad behavior—you’re not! You’re using screen time as a solution to set your child up for a successful transition.
3. Let technology be the “bad guy.”:
First, determine what is a reasonable amount of screen time for your child based on their age and developmental stage. The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) recommends no more than one hour of screen time per day for children aged 2–5, and no more than two hours per day for children aged 6+. Once you’ve made a decision, set your child’s devices to automatically shut down after that amount of time has been reached. You can also deactivate their devices during certain hours, for example, from 7pm–7am when they should be sleeping. By letting the device determine how long and when your child can use technology—rather than monitoring it yourself—you’ll dramatically limit the amount of dysregulation that arises from screen time limits.
4. Make it easier to stop:
“Tech traps” are a real thing. Technology is designed to keep us on-screen because, frankly, the more time we spend using technology, the more money businesses and advertisers can make. The flashing lights and bright colors and catchy designs, it’s all designed to trigger a dopamine response that keeps us eagerly ingesting technology. Switching your device to a black-and-white color profile can help reduce that dopamine response, making it easier to transition away from technology when the time comes.
5. Limit exposure to advertising:
The truth is, technology can be quite educational: children can learn how to read, develop problem-solving skills, explore their creativity, enhance social skills, and there are even devices—like Osmo—which can teach your children coding and other advanced skills. However, a lot of free apps—even those that are highly educational—will push ads out on regular intervals. Subscribing to premium versions of those apps, or even to the Apple Arcade, can reduce exposure to ads that you may not want your child to see.
6. Take a break from technology:
If your child is experiencing behavioral challenges as a result of technology, it might be time to take a two week break, or otherwise redefine your household’s screen time rules. As an adult, I often find myself needing to redefine my relationship with technology. For example, I might set a new rule for myself that limits how often I check my email. Anyone else check their email every ten minutes? Might be time YOU took a tech break, too!
7. Encourage outdoor play:
Encourage your child to spend time outdoors engaging in physical activities. Outdoor play not only promotes physical health, but also stimulates creativity, problem-solving skills, and social interactions.
8. Lead by example:
Be mindful of your own screen time habits and set a positive example for your child. Limit your own screen time and prioritize quality time spent with your child.
By being proactive, intentional, and realistic about managing your child’s screen time, you can help promote their healthy development and overall well-being. Remember, finding the right balance is key. It’s okay to seek guidance from pediatricians or child development experts if you have concerns about your child’s screen time habits. Ultimately, as parents, our goal is to provide our children with the tools and opportunities they need to thrive in a digital world, while also nurturing their physical, emotional, and social development.
If you’d like to talk to me about your child’s screen time habits—or their behavior, in general—please reach out. You can get in touch using the brief form below, or by calling (503) 208-4007.
*** Disclaimer
This blog is for entertainment, informational, and general educational purposes only and should not be considered to be healthcare advice or medical diagnosis, treatment or prescribing. The Content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical care. Always seek the advice of your qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website.
